Things Change

For a large part of my life getting into dental school was my all consuming desire.  I spent four years in undergrad studying dental hygiene and completing prerequisites for dental school.  Then I spent five years applying, interviewing, improving, and reapplying.  I just thought if I could get into dental school I would be so happy and feel complete.  It really became an idol for me.  Obviously with that as my focus, meeting with such continued discouragement over five years saw me in some pretty low places.  Thankfully God is in control of everything and He pulled some behind the scene strings and worked things out.  He opened my eyes to see that I didn't need to get into dental school.  He let me see the joy and fulfillment I had been looking for all those years was free for the taking and it was in Him.  He knew that giving me what I wanted when I was so dependent on it would crush me.  It was only after I finally opened myself to His leading that He opened the doors that He had held shut all those years.

The life I always dreamed of involved being a hotshot dentist (let's try to change that to humble, compassionate dentist and give it a half check), having a smokin hot wife (double check), and kids (here begins our story).  I had always envisioned kids, but hadn't thought much about it beyond that.
The more I thought about how God had sought me out when I was alone and without hope, the more I realized that on a smaller scale that's what He was calling me to do for others.  There are many ways to act as a missionary for God and I can assure you so far I have not felt the call to go live in a straw hut in Africa or a mud hut in the mountains of Pakistan (I'm taking baby steps here, not 180 degree turns).  What Kristin and I have felt a huge leading towards is adoption.

I have recently been studying through the book Jesus the King by Tim Keller with a friend from school.  It is one of the best books I have ever read and has put words to things I knew to be true, but had never really considered.  It presents a story of how much Jesus has done for us and how incredibly moving that is.  I highly recommend it and will quote it a bit here, as I see a lot of parallels between Keller's points on the Gospel and my thoughts on adoption.

According to the Guttmacher institute (a semi connected arm of Planned Parenthood), half of pregnancies among American women are unintended, and four in 10 of these are terminated by abortion.  That means that at least twenty percent of all pregnancies in the US (excluding miscarriages) end in abortion.  They go on to say that in 2011, 1.06 million legal abortions were performed.  Now I am not so naive as to think that just knowing that there is a loving family ready and willing to adopt the child that they cannot or will not raise will stop every person from having an abortion, but I would like to think that it would help.  As Keller states, we know that we are called to "Be so sacrificially loving that the people around you, who don't believe what you believe, will soon be unable to imagine the place without you."  If these people around us could see that we honestly did care and were ready to back our words with actions, then more innocent little children would have the opportunity not only to live, but to grow up hearing the good news of Jesus Christ each and every day.  This is a tremendous mission field!

According to UNICEF there are approximately 18 million orphans worldwide.  In the U.S. alone there are 400,000 children living in the foster care system.  The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services states that over a quarter of these are currently eligible for adoptions, but a third of them will wait over three years before being adopted.  So we know there are millions of babies being killed because their parents can't provide for them or don't want them and a few million more who don't know what its like to be loved and accepted.  We also know that God already sees the plans for each and every one of those children.  He knows if and when we are meant to adopt one.  He knows exactly which one it is.  He knows his or her race, age, gender, wants, needs, everything.  We don't know any of this and that is quite honestly a little bit scary.  However, we can rest in the fact that He does know and all we are called to do is trust Him in His leading.

Moving to Greenville has been an exciting time and a time of great growth for both Kristin and myself.  We have had to step out of our comfort zone a lot and it has been incredible to see the whole process unfold. God has proven Himself time and again and made His grace feel more real than ever before.  In the face of this, how can we do other than to joyfully submit ourselves to His service.  I'd like to quote again from Keller; I know that it's a long quote, but one that I feel speaks to this perfectly.

"But if Jesus is the King you cannot make him a means to your end. You can't come to a king negotiating. You lay your sword at a king's feet and say, "Command me." If you try to negotiate instead, if you say, "I'll obey you if. . . ," you aren't recognizing him as a king. But don't forget this: Jesus is not just a king; he's a king on a cross. If he were only a king on a throne, you'd submit to him just because you have to. But he's a king who went to the cross for you. Therefore you can submit to him out of love and trust. This means coming to him not negotiating but saying, "Lord, whatever you ask I will do, whatever you send I will accept." When someone gave himself utterly for you, how can you not give yourself utterly to him? Taking up your cross means for you to die to self-determination, die to control of your own life, die to using him for your agenda."

The more real this message becomes for me the more I have trusted Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  We don't know the exact plan that God has for us, but we can trust that it is good and no matter what it is He is in control!

~Buzzy